Mechanical Beauty
by Kitsune Slave
Summary: Renge's rising platform is on the fritz. With all the sand and surf the poor thing's had to take, it's been fixed more times than necessary. There's only one chance it has for living again- Pyxis. She's a prodigy mechanic within the school who does her own thing. She takes the job but when it comes to the hosts, she's uninterested. Who will she end up with? Dunno... rated M
1. Gidgit

((Yes, another one BUT! I have a good excuse! The character I had in mind for this is different from all the others! She was already half-created and I just finished her on the way home from work! And the best part is... she will have absolutely NO romantic interest in our male hosts WHATSOEVER! That's not to say that they won't be going after her but she's about as dense as Haruhi when it comes to that kind of thing. Think Sheldon Cooper without all that 'I am the big cheese' attitude. Yes, he's my favorite character from Big Bang Theory... I want to hug him part of the time because of how clueless he is and I'm very much like him without the super-genius-ness.

Anyway! I own nothing in this fic but my OC and my plot! Bisco Hatori is the wonderful creator of the Ouran High School Host Club and I am honored to do this fanfic! Now without further ado, let's do this thing!))

Chapter 1: Gidgit

The Host Club was in trouble. Renge's motorized platform was on the fritz again. With her dragging it around everywhere, you could imagine how many times it would break down from the sandy abuse and the large amount of moisture due to tropical themes and other such themes that their King came up with. They'd gone through every mechanic in the phone book after their usual ones refused to work on it. Apparently even mechanics get sick of working on the same thing and there was only so many times they were willing to play "Doctor Frankenstein" with the damn thing.

Renge was unhappy and when she was unhappy, she made damn sure that no one else was happy. Tamaki occupied his corner, the twins tormented Haruhi as a means to try to ignore their manager's wailing. Honey failed miserably in trying to cheer her up and Mori had grabbed him to run away from the snake-haired Renge. Kyoya, who'd been working hard to get the problem fixed, hadn't slept well the night before and a headache was starting to transform him into his demon lord state.

"I didn't want to do this..." he growled, rubbing at his temples. His glare was sharpened due to the fact that his glasses weren't on his face at the moment. He was just glad that there were no customers to see this pathetic display of spoiled rotten. Of course, their lady manager had cancelled the club. On her own. WITHOUT consulting him and all because of that DAMN PLATFORM! Yeah, he wasn't too thrilled with the loss of money. "... but there is someone who may take the job..."

Renge stopped her pursuit of the blond senior and twirled around, brown eyes sparkling. "My hero! Kyoya, who is it!? I'll go get them and be back in a moe-minute!"

He sighed and pulled out his cell phone. "No need. She'll probably come here IF she'll take the job. As it stands, there's a flier going around, warning all mechanics to stay away from your motorized platform. Seems it's a plea to 'let dead motors die in peace'..." He began to make the call, heading to the back for some quiet.

Tamaki was out of his corner and bugging Haruhi. "Daddy wonders who he's calling... he said it's a girl. Haruhi, do you know any female mechanics?"

The scholarship student's eyebrow twitched in irritation. "Just because she knows about motors, that doesn't mean that I know who she is... or that she's poor. Maybe it's a hobby?"

Hikaru snorted, Kaoru giggling softly. "Silly Haruhi, what girl works with machines and grease for FUN?" they asked with synchronized perfection.

"WHO CARES?!" Renge shouted, itching with excitement. She'd gone without her platform for 24 hours and it was practically killing her.

"Tama-chan tried to fix it but it still won't work..." Honey commented, taking a bite of cake. The King had taken it upon himself to fix the mechanical blunder when the professionals kept refusing the job. But since he had never done such a thing, it was obvious that he couldn't do much good with it.

Kyoya returned to the main room with a sigh. "She took the job but she can't give an estimate until she comes to look at it. I suppose despite the eye-sore, it was a good thing it died while out in the open... She'll be here momentarily."

Honey blinked curiously. "I wonder what this girl looks like." Mori nodded from his position next to his cousin.

"If the magazines are correct, she's probably some big-boned girl in overalls. And most likely sporting a unibrow," Hikaru commented, scratching his head in boredom. He didn't want to see that and Kaoru was in agreement. "She's probably wearing oil-stained sneakers and smells like a gas station..."

Haruhi frowned. "That's stereotyping, you two!"

"Hey, Haruhi, wanna bet?" the twins asked, grinning. Finally they had something to do. "Fifty bucks says she's just like we said! And if you lose, we get to spend the weekend at your place!"

The brunette bit her lip. It wasn't a bad deal... they'd probably find their way to her place anyway. "Deal," she said with a sigh.

The door opened to reveal a thin electric blue-haired lady. She was just shorter than Tamaki and her eyes were silver. Makeup was stylishly applied with degrees of black and silver, her cheeks the color of dusk roses and looked remarkably natural. Her soft pink lips curled up in a confident smirk. " 'bout time ya called me, Kyoya. Ya know the crap I been hearin' from my uncle 'bout you? Says you were unnaturally cruel ta some kinda machine? What the fuck?"

The twins' jaws were dropped at her style. Yes, she wore overalls but the straps weren't holding them up, her flared hips were. A thin white tank top, grease-splattered, was cut off at her mid-drift, her sneakers only adding to the grease-monkey look. And they had to admit... she looked hot like that! Her hair was cut in a cute pixie-bob, the front longer than the back and ending at her chin.

"Pyxis... you know me better than that..." Kyoya was at the end of his rope, his purple aura of evil swirling around him.

She just rose an eyebrow. "Really? Yer really gonna try pullin' that crap on me?" She turned her back on everyone else, squaring up against the demon lord. "Bring it, big boy. I'll take ya down with my wrench before yer evil even attempts ta threaten me. Now put it back 'fore ya get hurt..." Her voice deepened with a low growl that sent shivers down Mori's spine.

The Ootori sighed, the purple aura slowly dissipating. "I've been busy..."

"Yeah, yeah... been tryin' ta find someone ta fix yer attempt at Frankenstein's monster and prolly didn't sleep well last night. Just point me ta the poor thin' an' I'll see what I can do."

He pointed behind her and she saw it. Immediately, a sorrowful look came across her features. "Someone's been paintin' over the rough patches... 's all scratched..." She moved to the platform and gently ran her hand down it's side, causing both Renge and Tamaki to blush at the tenderness in the caress of her thin fingers. She easily found the door to the mechanized pieces inside and opened it to take a look.

Her face went from sad to pissed in point-5 seconds. "Who fucked with it?" She glared at the others, not even trying to accuse the VP.

Hikaru and Kaoru sold their boss out immediately and she stormed over to him and slapped him. "That's fer operatin' without a license."

He was flabbergasted and held his cheeks, purple eyes watering as they looked into the cold-steel of Pyxis' eyes. "I-I was just trying to help! We couldn't find anyone and-"

"No excuses. I can tell a hack-job from an attempt from someone who kinda knows what they're doin'. You had NO IDEA what you were doin' and tried McGuyver-in' it. By the way, he does more than just fix things with a paperclip and two rubber bands. Ya, sir, are a gidgit. Someone who thinks they can do somethin' when they shouldn't even try an' thinks they'll get away with it."

Pyxis turned and went back to looking at the motor. "Sand's all up in there... rust... this is terrible... 'nough ta make a lady cry. What kinda monster did this ta such an innocent machine...?" Her eyes turned sad again as she accessed the damage.

Honey's eyes bubbled up with tears and he went forward, holding out a piece of cake. "Pyxie-chan, have some cake... it'll make you feel better..."

She looked at him and softly smiled, shaking her head. "Nah, 's okay... Thanks but ya should have it. Ya look like yer 'bout ta cry, yaself..." She ruffled his hair with a small smirk. " 'sides, 'm not the best fer no reason. Good mechanical genes on both sides of m' family, ya know. But this'll cost some serious bank... and Uncle'll shit kittens fer a week if I take this job on. A month if I bring it back from the dead..."

Pyxis stood up and glared directly at Kyoya. "My terms, Kyoya- no sand, no water, no damn humidity... And that's only IF I can fix it. If not, it's scrap metal... Deal?" The Vice President moved to her side and held out a hand, which she shook. The deal was made and they would discuss pricing as soon as she found parts to get the job done.

She left the room without so much as a goodbye to anyone. The other male members of the club and Renge were staring at the door the mechanical beauty had just left through, a slight trance washed over them. Only Haruhi and Kyoya were unaffected for the most part.

"Hikaru, Kaoru... You owe me 50 bucks..."

((Tell me what you think and yes, I'll still be updating when I can! And as for the name of the chapter- Git + Idiot = Gidgit. Review for me, my pretties!))


	2. Achilles' Heel

((Thanks to all who reviewed and favorited this story thus far! I've decided to give Pyxis a phobia... just to make her more human-like. My original concept of her was more mechanical than human but everything has a weakness, yeah? Here we go!))

Chapter 2: Achilles' Heel

Pyxis was back a few days later. By that time, Renge was furious. She had gone the better half of a week without her beloved motorized platform and the result of that had her foaming at the mouth like a mutt with rabies. In fact, the only reason the blue-haired mechanic was back was because the female manager had dragged her out of the auto shop and into the music room.

No hosting had gone on in that room and they couldn't book the school grounds on such short notice. So the fans were starved for the hosts and insisted on talking to them during class, during lunch breaks, even going so far as to follow them into the men's bathroom to get some sense of host-club-dom. Honey was always on the look out for their zombie-like fan girls and practically attacked the mechanic in one of his infamous tackle-hugs, calling out her name.

"Pyxie-chan!" The tiny senior held onto her waist as he told her about his day. "You wouldn't believe the girls today! They were popping up everywhere we went! One of them wanted Bun-bun! And when I wouldn't give him up, another girl wanted his ears! It was so weird and I wanted to cry but Takashi told me that if I held in my tears, I could have an extra piece of cake for lunch! Ne, Takashi?!"

The tall young man watched the interaction with his usual somber face. He saw that something was wrong with Pyxis but couldn't think of a plausible reason. She liked Mitsukuni, at least that was the impression he had from a few days ago. So why did it looked like she was frozen stiff, not even breathing? Whatever was going on, he decided to solve the problem and removed Honey from her person, grunting an answer as he walked away to pacify the situation with cake for his charge.

Pyxis let out the breath slowly and shook her head. "Girls are nuts... right, Renge?" She turned her silver glare to the manager, pissed off that she'd been yanked around like some kind of rag doll.

"Just get to work already! It'll get even more moe-crazy if you don't hurry!" Renge roared, her eyes sparking in fiery desire.

The mechanic just snorted and crossed her arms. " That a threat? Besides, I need 'n air compressor an' a air gun to get rid of all the sand that ya FORCED this innocent piece of equipment t' take! An' I still can't fin' some o' th parts... I could grind down th' rust that ya SOILED it with but tha's just cruel an' would only shorten it's already extended life even more than before. Kyoya, I'm gonna need ya t' check yer databases fer these parts. Japan doesn't 'ave 'em an' I have no connections in America so they'd probly jack-up th' price for a lil' girl like meh."

The cool host accepted the piece of paper with various parts scribbled on it. Pyxis could see the numbers crashing into his brain and setting it on fire as he walked away with his evil purple aura. And she grinned maliciously at his sudden depression. Served the bastard right, letting some little girl run around with expensive machines without even considering the outcome. She bet he was too busy "hosting" paying customers while the poor thing died on the inside.

As she mused, she failed to notice two mischievous characters sneak up behind her. Only when their arms wrapped around her, trapping both of her arms, did she notice them.

The Hitachiin twins smirked as they held their captive prey in their arms. The way they saw it, she was much too cute for them not to hug- kind of like a punk version of Haruhi, plus the curves. They chuckled when they felt the small bluenette struggle against the limb restraints and said, "It's just a hug, Pyxis. Not gonna kill you- wait, Mori-senpai, what the Hell?" The two were pried off their new toy by the giant host and placed about 5 feet away from the adorable female.

Mori then put a hand on her back and started guiding her out of the clubroom, Honey following with a look of concern. "Pyxie-chan doesn't look so good... do you need to cry?" he asked after they'd walked all the way to the rose maze. It didn't really matter that they'd ditched the club since they couldn't do anything with Renge behaving like a lunatic.

The blue-haired girl just shook her head, wrapping her arms around her torso and biting her lip. "Nah... I'm fine..." Her voice was soft, almost mechanical.

The two hosts guided her to a bench and sat down beside her. Honey gently gave her Bun-bun before asking, "Why don't you like people hugging you?" His voice was also soft as he childishly spoke. Mori looked over at his blond cousin and shook his head.

But Pyxis answered anyway. "... I dun like touchin' people... I can' und'rstand why an'body would want t' hug meh."

The oldest cousin raised his hand with a smile. "I know, I know! I like hugging Pyxie-chan because she's so cute and cuddly! She's like a blue Bun-bun! And I want her to know that I like her for who she is!"

The mechanic looked over at him with confused eyes. It was like she couldn't understand his words. She asked, "Ya like meh...for meh? Even if I like machines more th'n people?" At this moment, she seemed more like a child than the baby-face host. "I like ya too, Honey... bu' I dunno wha' it is t' interact wit' people. I've got uncles, grandfathers, a father. All mechanics of some sort. They're not big on huggin', y'know?"

Honey and Mori exchanged glances before the blond leaned his head against Pyxis' shoulder. He looked even younger doing that but he wanted to try something. When she flinched, he asked, "You want me and Takashi to tell the others so we don't scare you again?"

She shook her head. "Knowin' 'em, they'll do it more if ya tell 'em not ta... 'course, I dun wanna slug 'em... 's kinda like bein' caught between two matched gears..."

"Then I'll train you in hugging so you can get used to it!" Honey cheered, acting like he just had a perfect plan. "I can defend myself so you won't have to worry about me! And Takashi can be on look out in case other people go to hug you!"

The bluenette looked up at the tall senior, silver eyes wide. "Y-ya wanna do tha'? I ain't gonna force ya..."

At Mori's nod, she blushed, making her rosey cheeks even darker. The girl abruptly stood up and walked a couple of steps away, trying to hide her face. "Y-Yer both real good at makin' a lady blush, ya know that?! Bu' 's not an offer I can refuse... s' okay. As odd as it soun's, Honey, I'll take ya both up on yer offer!" She turned back to them, her emotions under control, eyebrows scrunched to try to keep them down.

Honey hurrah'ed and jumped on her, squeezing her happily. This froze her stiff but Mori put his hand on her head and gently messed up her hair. That motion seemed to melt her paralyzed state. Pyxis knew one thing for sure- machines never sparked such conflicting emotions in her before. And that was what made them way better than human beings.

((The end for now. Yes, Pyxis experiences emotions just like anybody else. She just doesn't understand them most of the time. In fact, she hates them because of that very reason. A hugging coach is weird but asking people what certain feelings mean is even weirder. She kinda needs help with both... but wishes that she could just be a robot so she wouldn't have to deal with emotions. Review, review, review!))


	3. Sandblasted HELL and a Half

((Sorry for the long wait, everybody. I'm trying to get a bunch of stories updated in one shot. My narcolepsy is getting weirder and weirder so yeah... along with my sleep paralysis at messed up times when I'm conscious, I'm also unbearably tired after being awake for, like, an hour. But I will continue to update as much as possible. It'd be easier with internet at my house... oh! And I'm also working two jobs! I need the money and the motivation during my days off.

On a different note, I've been told that Pyxis's accent is way too heavy. One person said that it reminded them of a scottish punk rocker. That wasn't what I was going for so I lightened up on it. There is still an accent but it's not so harsh. I'll eventually go back and change the first 2 chapters.

Thanks to all who have reviewed, favorited, and followed this story thus far. So now, without further ado...))

Chapter 3: Sandblasted HELL and a Half

The Host Club existed for the sole purpose of making every girl happy. So a week of pure sorrow had the hosts tending to their fans in the rose garden. Kyoya had booked that Monday afternoon as an attempt to calm the craziness. And boy were they well received. However, the shadow king was not so easily consoled. He knew that, at that current moment, their precious club room was mimicking a wind-swept beach.

Yes, indeed. Kyoya got the needed tools and parts through his connections and Pyxis was airing out Renge's damnable moving high-powered pedestal, freeing it from the remnants of the sand and surf. And the 'cool type' would make sure their 'manager' would pay every last yen of the cleaning fees.

Pyxis wasn't very happy either. She had sand in places she didn't know she had. Her hair was a literal sand trap and she'd have to take a shower at the school in order to work out the grittiness- no way she was taking this mess home with her. The boys at home would use the sand as a piss-poor excuse for her to clean the tub for a month.

Though her family was made up of the best mechanics this side of the world, the family did not live in the lap of luxury like most of the kids attending Ouran. They did things for themselves. Pyxis was in charge of the food. Her older brothers cleaned the house with the same reluctance. If they knew how to make decent food, she knew they'd hand over the vacuum in a micro-second.

As luck would have it, there was a single dress in the back. Strange how she distinctly remembered Kyoya having all the cosplay outfits removed before she'd started her dirty work. But still, a dress was an odd thing to be in a HOST club... could one of them be a cross dresser? None of them seemed like that. It was a white flimsy frock-like dress, the straps made of black lace that even a girl like Pyxis could appreciate. Well, regardless of the 'why', the dress was all she had that wasn't sand-blasted. And the Host Club had it's own shower room. So she headed in, locking the door behind her.

The young hosts entered their club room cautiously, only to be relieved at the mechanic's lack of attendance. Renge was not with them. But the Vice President was none-too-thrilled at the sand scattered about. Honey cheered about it looking like the beach and wanting ice cream. Tamaki grumbled at Pyxis not cleaning up her mess.

"Mommy-dearest, I think we should ground our step-daughter until she learns some respect!"

Kyoya rolled his eyes, already calling a cleaning service. "Really, Tamaki, it would be easier training the twins to be your obediant slaves... yes, I'd like to-" He walked away from the group to conduct his business.

Haruhi looked around curiously. "Speaking of those two, where did they go? Weren't they right behind us?"

Mori pointed towards the back room with a grunt. A slight commotion came from behind the door before Hikaru opened the door, looking ticked off. "Milord, where is it?"

Tamaki's blank face seemed to only infuriate the hot-headed twin even more. He stomped of the back room with Kaoru at his heels carrying an empty hanger with the same irritated look on his face.

"Where is our dress, Milord?! We made it for Haruhi! It's a little big around the bust but it'll give her hope for the future! Now where did you put it?!"

Both Haruhi and Tamaki colored in anger and embarrassment. But before either could shout at the rude twins, Pyxis came out of the back room, hair wet and slightly spiky. She wore the missing garment well, her delicate curves highlighted by the flimsy fabric. She tilted her head and apologized. "If I'd known this was for Haruhi, I would've asked for permission first. But m' clothes were crusted with sand... sorry, Haruhi..." The rough girl had the decency to look slightly guilty, however, her voice lacked the emotion.

Hikaru and Kaoru glared in the mechanic's direction before giving her 4 thumbs up. "Looks good, Pyxis. Keep it- we'll just make her a new one..."

Tamaki began to screech about the twins sabotaging his 'little girl'. Kyoya rolled his eyes, writing in his little black book.

"Pyxis won't say anything. She knows the value of secrecy... and we have a contract..."

"..." Everyone but Kyoya, Pyxis, and Mori's jaws dropped. "What?!"

Kyoya smirked, chuckling lightly. "As if I'd leave our secrets out in the open without any security. Really now, that's just ridiculous. The chances of her finding out were quite high. I made her sign a confidentiality before she got started on the job. I didn't tell her anything, I had all our bases covered, as usual."

Pyxis rolled her eyes. "Whatevah, egomaniac... I'm goin' home since you obviously covered all yer bases and gotta cleanin' service ta finish the job..." She walked over to Haruhi and took hold of her sleeve like a pushy 4 year old. "And yer comin' with me, Haruhi. There's no way I can keep a dress this pretty in a house full'a he-men. They're already gonna gimme Hell fer wearin' it. So it'll be nicer in yer closet." And with that, she pulled the small brunette out of the room, waving goodbye to the boys over her head in an easy-going motion.


End file.
